By Dr. Love
“What are your thoughts on sliding into someone’s DMs? Our campus is always talking about different perspectives on technology, but does tech necessarily kill romance? You see, I want to get to know this guy on campus that I follow on Instagram but rarely see in person, and I feel like a DM might be my best bet. But sliding into someone’s DMs seems like the most boring story to tell your kids one day. What should I do?”
Does tech kill romance? I’d say that dating apps do. Name any dating app, and I can tell you at least two horror stories that have happened to my friends or people I know. It’s a waste of time, time that you could spend talking to that person in real life. That isn’t to say that there haven’t been any success stories, but those are the exceptions, not the norm.
I believe in meet-cutes (aka meeting someone organically), or at least in a friend setting you and someone else up. Isn’t that the dream? I want to be able to tell my kids that my spouse really put the effort in to get to know me. In all honesty, I think sliding into the DMs is a cop-out.
On a campus as small as Grove City College, someone has to know him or one of his friends. If that’s so, someone can organize a group thing where he gets invited.
Even if you only randomly see him on campus, figure out what he does in his free time. Lots of guys can be found in their natural habitat (aka the gym), on the quad playing Spikeball or chipping golf balls near MAP. Catch them on their way out of the gym and say hi! Or, even better, ask to join their Spikeball game with the friend you’re walking with. It isn’t weird, especially since the weather has been absolutely gorgeous. Plus, if you aren’t a senior, you have plenty of time to cross paths or have a HUMA class together.
As of late, multiple people had the courage to slide into my DMs. I applauded their effort and was, of course, flattered, but these attempts always fell flat for me. Either we had never talked before, and I genuinely had no idea who they were, or they just started off poorly. I need to have at least one in-person conversation with them to have a good start to the online conversation. Otherwise, it’s just awkward.
It sounds like you and I are in a similar situation. There’s someone I’m interested in as well, but it appears I have an advantage since we’re in some classes together.
You know, a lot of people say, do as I say, not as I do. That’s not the case here. So trust me, I mean it just as much for myself as I do for you.
Best of luck!
