April 17, 2026
As a Grover-achiever, what’s the craziest thing you have ever done for the sake of efficiency?
“Ok. Study day, spring 2025. My computer screen was divided into three separate sections for three different classes. I was actively studying all three and eating lunch. I aced those exams, so it worked!” — Emily Lewis ’28
“I bought a portable computer monitor so that I can have a 2-monitor study setup wherever I go.” — Joseph Lanzone ’29
“Taking my computer to the bathroom to review PowerPoints while peeing.” — Calliope Leach ’28
“I once gave myself a strict 12-minute eating window and ate the same meal for a solid week so I wouldn’t “waste time” deciding what to eat.” — Elise DiFrischia ’29
“Pace in a circle for at least 30 minutes while studying for finals to get my step goal and retain information.” — Victoria Freeland ’29
“Rolled out of the top bunk (with the railing removed) in my work clothes at 4 a.m. after five hours of sleep to finish a 10-page paper due in class at 8 a.m. which I started the afternoon before. They say sleeping is more efficient than staying up all night.” — Joshua Youngquist ’28
“I wait to pee until after I finish whatever I am working on (even if it’s five more pages of an essay).” — Elizabeth Hoff ’29
March 27, 2026
Who did you suspect was the killer during the Murder on the Dance Floor event?
With his good looks and his lack of surprise, Blaze (Tyler) was a killer from the start. Though he was trying to restart his career, he ended up killing it.
James Brooks ’29
I surely thought it was the fair Miss Rosie Byrne (Anna Schwartz). She was the short one with a short temper…
Daniel Griffith ’27
I initially believed it was Dr. Pine; his fascination with venomous insects and his aloof demeanor made him the ideal villain for the event.
Mason Kraeer ’27
Professor Pine! Because why would anyone who likes bugs not consider murder?
Carson Brown ’29
I thought it was Blaze, because it was clear that he was not a good investigator. And his own brother said he didn’t trust him.
Joey Lanzone ’29
I thought it was Pine because all the signs pointed to poison. I didn’t think it would be Tyler (Blaze) because it’s never the person you most suspect … I was very wrong.
Sabrina Herold ’29
March 20, 2026
Who is the most attractive person on campus?
Matthew Hammond— there is nothing more attractive than a godly man with Excel proficiency. — Sarah Smith ’28
Ana Monroe because she is so insanely put together, her hair is GOALS and her heart is also golden. — Sommer Ray ’28
Evan McCormick, he is so perfect to me. And he’s lowkey pretty ripped. Goated fr. — Emily Fox ’26
Garret Gess because he strikes like an unrelenting panther on the senses. — Christopher Garrett ’28
Braedon Weigle, because of his glittering eyes (Matt. 6:22-23!) — John Hatzis ’27
Zach Warrick — his smile lights up any room he’s in, and his long graceful strides put even a gazelle to shame. — David Thomas ’26
Ella Herrenbruck because she is beautiful inside and out! — Ellie Smith ’28
Annalina Brant — she brightens up the whole STEM second floor bio suite. — Luke Paglia ’27
Luke Chambers. He is like a Greek statue — curly hair, tan skin, sharp eyes…. Ideal man right there. — Peter Hasse ’27
Lila Stonehouse! Her faith is so steady and genuine, and she always spreads joy wherever she goes. Who would NOT be attracted to her? — Maya O’Dell ’28
Mason Bennett, for his massive philosophical forearms. — Braedon Weigle ’26
Jackson Gump. Cause dang boy, he’s like a young Brad Pitt. Blond hair, fit bod, great facial structure. — Ian Schartner ’28
Emily Haught — not only is Emily beautiful, she’s one of the funniest and kindest people I know. — Leyla Zwolinski ’27
Dan Artale. I mean just look at him… — Micah Kim ’27
March 13, 2026
What is left on your senior year bucket list?
Watching all of the spring sports play a full game. — Bernie Komoroski ’26
Going camping with my roommates! — Izzy Olenik ’26
Wading in the creek (I’ve never been in there). — Abigail Collier ’26
Escaping the social pressures of the ring-by-spring tradition. — Benjamin Forastiere ’26
Going to the Dusty Armadillo to line dance. — Zander Bedingfield ’26
Writing an article for The Collegian! — Kinley Bowers ’26
Exploring the Rockwell bell tower and the towers on top of HAL. — Julia Sikora ’26
February 20, 2026
What are your spring break plans?
For spring break, I’ll be taking a trip with some other members of the cross-country team to a cabin near State College.
Jacob Call ’27
Chilling out with me, myself and I because my parents are going on vacation to Florida WITHOUT ME.
Lauren Gunning ’27
I will be flying out to Nebraska to visit my grandparent and great-grandmother, reading and translating Hebrew.
Zeke Frerichs ’27
Going to OMO (it’s like an ICO but not); we are going to a ranch near Pigeon Forge.
Susie Steltzer ’27
ICO Fatanooga (“Weight down, spirit up!”)
Luke Chambers ’28
Myrtle Beach to play softball!
Kristin Tesch ’26
February 6, 2026
What’s your best advice for talking to guys/girls?
Advice for talking to guys: I wouldn’t recommend it. Scout Burck ’28
Best advice for talking to girls: Idk just do it and don’t think. Collin Alexander ’26
How to start a conversation with a man, 100% guarantee: Ask which animal he thinks he could take in a fight. Iris North ’26
How to get the girl: Major in mechanical engineering and minor in dancing. Or major in mechanical engineering and minor in politics. Or minor in rizz. Conrad Smith ’29
Best piece of advice for talking to a woman: Just practice by talking to a wall, it’s pretty much the same thing. Colin McCormick ’26
How to start a conversation with a man: First of all, ask him outright if he hates women. Like this: ‘Do you hate women?’ If you wish to continue speaking with him after this, ask him what his favorite artist is. It doesn’t matter if you know the artist or not. Ask him if he’s heard their latest album, and start talking about how much they ‘cooked.’ Whatever you do, do not pick your nose. Cecilia Landis ’27
Best piece of advice for talking to the opposite gender: Rage bait them to infinity. Braedon Weigle ’26
Best piece of advice for talking to a boy: Criticize his ignoble and lowly birth. Abigail Buritica ’27
January 30, 2026
What’s your favorite class to teach?
Dr. Hubbard: I am very new but so far, it has been Christ Civ — I love getting to explore the Christian tradition with students and discuss how what we believe affects what we do in the world.
Dr. Drai: It changes from one semester to the next — History of Math right now because it is new, only my second time teaching it, so I am able to teach it better the second time around.
Dr. Coulter: Classical Political Thought because I get to teach Plato’s “Republic.”
Dr. Bandy: I like all my classes but this semester it is Special Events Promotion and Production because I help the students produce one of the biggest and best events on campus — a student film festival, an end-of-year celebration through storytelling!
Dr. Scholten: Curriculum and Instruction II this semester is so fun because, for the first time ever, I have a class entirely composed of students I have already had in the classroom. It’s special and doesn’t happen very often!
Dr. Hill: Mechatronics I because in it, I am an electrical engineer teaching electrical engineering to mechanical engineers, and they are two very different worlds. The entire Mechanical Engineering Department has to take the class, so I get a variety of personalities and lots of creativity on the exam questions!
January 23, 2026
What’s your favorite snow day activity?
Elias Freire ’28
Frolicking on Pinchalong
Christian Loizes ’29
I love sledding when I am at home – but I need some recommendations about where to go around here.
Malachi Stonehouse ’29
Building a snow fort – and if it’s comfortable, reading a book and drinking tea inside!
Sophia Pelsue ’27
Watching squirrels who love the snow but hate touching it, so they hop and play in such a dainty way.
Tyler Puttkammer ’26
Skiing from the commuter lot to the soccer field.
Scout Burck ’28
Sipping a hot cup of coffee and reading a book next to an (insulated!) window.
