Up until a few weeks ago, a sorority sister of mine was dating a guy. I always thought he was shy, sweet and kinda cute. They broke up a few weeks ago. Now, I can’t stop thinking about him.
Am I being disloyal to my sister by indulging this fantasy? Is it bad if I start dropping hints to him?
I may be part of a different sorority, but girl, I know who you are talking about, and they are back together. I saw them eating in Hicks the other week. Sorry, but you’ve got no chance with him.
Honestly, that’s probably good news for you. There are few better ways to obliterate sisterhood than running off with a sister’s ex before she even had time to recover. That is unkind, ungracious and a shocking betrayal of trust.
If your sorority sister breaks up with a guy, your first duty is to her. Comfort her, be kind, hear her story and be ready to cry with her. Perhaps he did something wrong, she did wrong or no one did wrong. Nevertheless, you should support her.
If you hear the story and realize that the guy you like isn’t a monster, great — give it six months before you do anything. Sound dramatic? You rushed the sorority — you are a part of that family now, and that family carries both rights and responsibilities. Let the dust settle (and, preferably, let the ex-girlfriend graduate), then take stock of your options.
If you’re still crazy for him after that, fine. Do what you want.
In the meantime, hold on tight and keep your mouth shut. Who knows? Maybe another guy will come by — or maybe the man you’re after will once again find himself on the market. Either way, no good would have come from pursuing him right after a breakup — so you should thank your lucky stars they reconciled before you went in for the kill.
