My roommate was involved with this guy last year, and I think she might still have feelings for him. The problem is, I have a bit of a crush on him. What should I do? Would I be a bad friend if I went for it?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Sincerely, Stuck Between My Roommate and a Crush<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Do you want my short and sweet answer? Here it is: YES.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Crushes come and go. Friends are way more important than any guy could ever be. Don\u2019t risk your friendship and the rest of your year over someone you have a \u201cbit of a crush\u201d on. If you\u2019re asking me what I honestly think, I think you already know the answer.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
My slightly longer answer: let it go. I always hate when people say there\u2019s plenty of fish in the sea, but it is completely true.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
You\u2019d be setting yourself up for a messy incident, whether or not anything actually happens. The trust you have built with each other is enough to live with one another all year. Jeopardizing that by bringing a guy that you think she still has feelings for into the mix is pretty high on the list of no-gos.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It\u2019s not a bad thing to have a crush on someone, but this is a conscious choice: If the possibility of being a bad friend crosses your mind when you\u2019re about to do something, that means you were probably about to be a bad friend. Loyalty has to mean something, right?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Let\u2019s say you did go for it and it works out. Now every time you want to bring him over or talk about him, your friend will be reminded that you cared more for a random boy than her feelings or her as a friend.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Even if she tries to act nonchalant, she probably won\u2019t love that you went for someone she still has feelings for. If it fizzles out, what then? You\u2019ve already broken her trust over a boy that didn\u2019t even last the month.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Girl code rule number one: you don\u2019t go for past flames, whether that flame has been extinguished or not.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
At the end of the day, he\u2019s just a guy. Chances are he\u2019s not the love of your life. I\u2019m not telling you to never have a crush on anyone ever again, but try not to burn up your existing relationships in the search for \u201cthe one.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Good luck!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Auspiciously,<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Dr. Love Love M.D.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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